Wikipedia:WikiProject Film/Peer review/Rob-B-Hood

Rob-B-Hood

Over the last couple of weeks, I've worked substantially on this article, adding a section detailing its production, a cast list, a detailed plot, the release information and the reception. My goal is that the article be eventually featured one day, so I'd like as much constructive feedback as possible to improve it. Thanks.--Alasdair 06:20, 29 August 2007 (UTC)

Peer review by Wisekwai

Casting

• Second paragraph: "Koo was the baby's favourite on set, and, whenever the baby cried, Koo was always the first to cheer him up.

Filming

• Second paragraph: " ...even though a second unit was used." Unnecessary detail. The film went over budget. Period.
• Third paragraph: Pipelink quad bike.

Images

• Crop the black letterboxing bars off the screenshots, and if possible, brighten them slightly. If you need assistance, let me know.

Cast

• Who portrays Max? He's a small role I realize, but he's important in the beginning.
• Melody, a student nurse

Plot

• Second paragraph: A few months later, the Landlord loses his life savings following a burglary of his flat.

Releases

• Template:Infobox movie certificates will help encapsulate the ratings information and help expand upon other country releases. The Japan image could be swapped left or moved to reception, or the ratings box could be placed in reception.
• Any details on the DVD release for regions 1 and 2?

Reception

• How about some exact quotes from the critics? A search on MRQE might turn up some unique reviews that you can use.

External links

• It's okay to include links to IMDb and the official site, even though they are summarized in the infobox. Rotten Tomatoes, Metacritic, MRQE and All Movie Guide could be included if the pages have anything meaningful.

Overall

• An entertaining and informative read. I had watched a good portion of the movie on Thai-dubbed VCD while waiting for free gift wrapping at a department store. So this article helped fill in the blanks. — WiseKwai 07:44, 30 August 2007 (UTC)

Peer review by Epbr123

Prose

• "It is the first film in which Jackie Chan plays a villain, a burglar with gambling problems." - reads as though this is the first film he plays a burglar with gambling problems.
• "Golden Harvest's departure from the film industry" - reads as though Golden Harvest left the film industry to work in another industry.
• "Warriors of Heaven and Earth and The Banquet and Kekexili: Mountain Patrol." - too many ands.
• "Chan has starred in over 50 action films throughout his acting career" - throughout his acting career is redundant.
• "stars of New Police Story make cameo apperances" - comma needed after Story.
• "littering by crew members in the premises, volunteering to take out the rubbish" - the comma should be replaced by and.
• "feeling slightly inconfident" - unconfident.
• "someone who would tempt others to do bad things" - change tempt to persuade.
• "has co-starred with Chan and Sammo Hung in a number of action comedy films" - remove has.
• "reunion of the "Three Brothers". However, the latter declined." - replace the full-stop after Brothers with a comma.
• "Police Inspector Mok, a policeman assigned to investigate" - a policeman is redundant.
• "and even a decomissioned prison." - the even is unencyclopedic
• "his crew had planned a surprise birthday party for several days" - reads as though the party lasted several days.
• "During his dinner break, the entire production staff, including board members of the production company, arrived taking pictures with Jackie Chan while actor Terence Yin presented him with two birthday cakes and a roast suckling pig." - sentence should be rearranged to reduce the number of commas. Also, reads as though Jackie Chan was taking pictures.
• "fans attended Jackie Chan's birthday party" - remove birthday so we know you're talking about the same party.
• "Chan acted as the stunt director of Rob-B-Hood" - replace the word acted.
• "performing his own stunts in the film, jumping from air-conditioner" - reads as though this was the only stunt he performed.
• "blowing cold air at them through a large fan" - change through to with.
• "in a hospital: A burglary committed" - the A shouldn't be capitalised.
• It should be mentioned earlier in the plot section why the triads want the baby.
• "the three see the nurses taking a blood sample from the baby. Thongs and Octopus experience a flashback" - did the nurses taking a blood sample cause them to have the flashbacks?
• "comes in two discs: A movie disc" - the A shouldn't be capitalised.
• "Benny Chan explains including too many" - add the word that after explains.
• "exceeding ¥90 million.[5]Rob-B-Hood performed well" - add a space after the ref.

Style

• Full dates and dates with a day and a month should be linked. The same applies to dates in the footnotes.
• " - a criminal and compuslive gambler" - en dash needed.
• "to play a heavy - a nasty" - en dash needed. Epbr123 09:14, 5 September 2007 (UTC)