Talk:Unorthodox Jukebox/GA2

GA Review[edit]

The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.

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Reviewer: Cartoon network freak (talk · contribs) 19:21, 11 September 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Soon... Cartoon network freak (talk) 19:21, 11 September 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Initial review

Lead

studio album by → studio album recorded by
2012, as → remove comma
debut studio album → debut record (word repetition)
material; Unorthodox Jukebox ultimately presented → material, but ended presenting
the whole album → the whole record
guest vocals → guest vocalists
Much of → Lyrically,
with more explicit → incorporating more explicit
Link reviewers to music journalism
was available → was made available
before the release → before its release
The album debuted → It debuted
the second spot in the → number two on the
the album peaked at number one on the chart becoming Mars first album to do so. → Unorthodox Jukebox topped the charts, marking the singer's first album to do so.
in the UK and third in 2012 → in the latter country and its third in 2012
and the fifth best-selling album in the United States in 2013 → remove "best-selling album"
was the fourth best-selling album in the world → was globally the fourth best-selling record
with 3.2 million copies sold. It has globally sold 6 million copies as of January 2015. → having brought total sales to 3.2 million copies, and to 6 million copies as of January 2015
The album won the → The record
The release of the album → The premiere of the album (word repetition)
by the release of one single. "Locked Out of Heaven" was released on October 1, 2012 as the album's lead single. It became a commercial success on music charts all over the world and topped the US Billboard Hot 100 chart for six consecutive weeks. → by the release of its lead single, "Locked Out of Heaven", which experienced commercial acclaim worldwide and topped the US Billboard Hot 100 chart for six consecutive weeks. (Release date isn't needed here.)
You should reword the release of the promotional singles, as it's a little bit confusing that one was released later as a stand-alone single.

Be more precise where is it cofusing? MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 17:37, 12 September 2016 (UTC)[reply]

You use the word "album" too often; try to alternate

Done

Infobox

Genres needn't be linked if they're cited in the composition section

They aren't so the links should remain. MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 17:38, 12 September 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Done

Background

Conception

rushed the debut album → his debut album
performances done by Mars → performances provided by Mars
acknowledge → past tense
dynamic performances → dynamic appearances (word repetition)
2012, on a preview of his cover story, that → remove comma
his debut album → his debut record
the artist → the singer
He elaborated → add comma afterwards
said to him, → expressed to him,
because he wanted to do → as he wanted to do
Nevertheless, Mars never forgot the most valuable lesson he learned when he started to write songs with rhythm. → more wikipedia-like, please...

Done

Recording

Composition

Singles

Release and promotion

Thumbnail → set full stop after the sentence.

No full stop as it's not a sentence, as per WP:CAPFRAG. MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 17:39, 12 September 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Bruno Mars told to his fans "You'll hear something in October. I promise", after being asked when people could expect news regarding his second studio album. → Mars reported to his fanbase that, "You'll...", after being asked for news regarding his second studio album.
On September 19, 2012, Mars announced the conclusion of "Unorthodox Jukebox" via Twitter after a year of working on it. To celebrate, he posted a link to a "Funny or Die" video titled "Whatta Man". In this video, he stars as himself. → On September 19, 2012, the singer announced the release of Unorthodox Jukebox via Twitter after having worked on it for a year. He further posted a link to a "Funny or Die" video entitled "Whatta Man" where Mars starred himself, in order to celebrate.
published, exclusively, the album's title as Unorthodox Jukebox and that it would be released on December 11, 2012 in the United States. → reported the album's title and its release date on December 11, 2012 in the United States.
producers, Mark Ronson → producers, including Mark Ronson
Digital Spy, revealed → Digital Spy revealed
to the album → to the album's
was released worldwide. → was premiered
Many word repetitions here as well

Such as? MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 17:45, 12 September 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Studio album, album, Mars, performed. Best, Cartoon network freak (talk) 18:48, 12 September 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Then, he performed the same songs → Afterwards, he sang the same songs
of the British → remove "the"
You use "performed" too often
an event annually held → an annually-held event
final show of the third season → final show of its third season
Mars began → Mark embarked
on June 22, 2013 → as of June 22, 2013
You use "leg" four times in a row here

Done

Critical reception

gave the album a A- → gave the album an A–
that "His → that "[Mars'
gave the album → awarded the album
that "The → that, "The
There are many times you use "gave the album" repeatedly; fix that

Only three times now, enough? MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 17:55, 12 September 2016 (UTC)[reply]

OK now. Cartoon network freak (talk) 18:49, 12 September 2016 (UTC)[reply]

rating, and wrote: "The → rating, pointing out that "the
The New York Times found the → The New York Times felt the (word repetition)
it" and complimenting → it" He went on complimenting
album "these → album, "these
Lipshutz viewed that the album → Lipshutz described that the record
showcases his knack → showcases the singer's knack
You're using the word "album" TOO often
Ryan Reed from Paste → Ryan Reed, writing in Paste
rating, saying → rating, confessing that
characteristic style, observed → characteristic style, observing
and felt that → and feeling that
unqualified triumph, Unorthodox Jukebox → the album should be in italics
Evan Rytlewski from The A.V. Club → The A.V. Club's Evan Rytlewski (word repetition)
praised the tracks → praising the tracks
"icky hater" → add comma afterwards
hater" hoping that "Mars can sort → you use the singer's last name two times in a row

Done

Accolades

The lead single → Its lead single
Song of the Year while its Sultan → add a comma after "Year"
The second single, → Afterwards, the record's second release
"When I Was Your Man" was → add comma after the song's title
was nominated for → received a nomination for (word repetition)
the 2013 MTV Europe Music Awards → You need to end the sentence + you may incorporate this were you talk about the lead single here
at number 2 → at number two
on Rdio's, an online music service, list "Top global albums" → on online music service Rdio's list of "Top global albums"
fifth most streamed worldwide → fifth most-streamed release worldwide

Done. As always take a second look.

Commercial performance

but it dropped → but dropped
on the top 5 in US, → within the top five in America
1,399,000 copies in the US → never shorten out United States to "US"
180% and the album rebounded back into the Top 10 → 180%, rebounding back within the top ten
In the following week, February 12, 2014, → For the week ending February 12, 2014,
"Unorthodox Jukebox" → should be italicized
Well, continuing, I see here are too many issues and repetitions. I think I'm going to do it by myself after we've done the re-review.

Done. Ok, fine by me. MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 16:46, 12 September 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Track listing

(*) denotes co-producer → you may use the version of this note used in It's Better If You Don't Understand
Sample credits → mention who's produced the song as well

Done

Personnel

Change the name of the section into "Credits and personnel".
The following people contributed to Unorthodox Jukebox: → Credits adapted from the liner notes of Unorthodox Jukebox
Additional musicians and production → Technical and composing credits
Additional personnel → Creative credits
Recording personnel → You should merge this into the "Technical and composing credits" section

That is going to make the first column too long, are you sure? MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 17:49, 12 September 2016 (UTC)[reply]

You can leave it this way then. It's as well correct. Cartoon network freak (talk) 18:49, 12 September 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Done

Charts

fine

Thanks. MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 17:38, 12 September 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Certifications and sales

You should add the bottom of the certifications table to allow readers understand what the "^" and fellow symbols mean.

Done I added the one with streaming.

Release history

On October 15 → mention the year as well
album became available → album was made available
worldwide, via Mars official site → worldwide via Mars's official website

If it ends with an "s" and it's possessive you don't need to add another "s" per say: "Mars'" → "Stan's". However, there is no right way, since I have been doing "Mars'" in all the articles will I stick to it. MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 16:50, 12 September 2016 (UTC)[reply]

OK then Cartoon network freak (talk) 18:50, 12 September 2016 (UTC)[reply]

with three → offering
an mediate → a mediate
Heaven": the standard CD or Digital Album, the Deluxe Bundle, which included the CD and an Unorthodox Jukebox T-shirt and the Ultimate Bundle, which had the same package as the Deluxe edition and featured an autographed screen print poster, limited to the first 300 orders, and a "Locked out of Heaven" key necklace. → Heaven", the standard CD or digital album, the deluxe bundle (which included the record's physical release, a T-shirt, and an ultimate bundle packaged similarly to the deluxe edition that featured an autographed screen print poster limited for the first 300 orders), and a key necklace for the single.
was first officially → remove "first"
November 5, 2013 the → add a comma after "2013"
A year later, on November 5, 2013 the deluxe edition of Target was released → A year later, on November 5, 2013, the deluxe edition of the record was made available for conumption
cover artwork → end the sentence here
and on November 9, 2013 → Four days later,
Use !scope="row" for countries
Unlink "Label(s)", record labels and formats
CD+DVD → CD, DVD

Done. The source really says CD+DVD, which is different from CD, DVD. MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 17:49, 12 September 2016 (UTC)[reply]

References and other stuff

Unlikely copy violation of 38.7%. Congrats!
No disambiguation links. Well done!
According to this review, there are some issues with a few links; fix them.

What do you mean by this? None of them are dead. MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 16:33, 12 September 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Some sources change path according to this. Cartoon network freak (talk) 19:26, 12 September 2016 (UTC)[reply]

MarioSoulTruthFan, I have now provided you a zoomed-out review of your nomination; once you fixed my issues, I will get more zoomed-in and in details with a re-review. I have noticed that this page shows up substantial grammar errors, as well unencyclopedic language and word repetition. But don't worry, we'll get through it! Cartoon network freak (talk) 05:30, 12 September 2016 (UTC)[reply]

@Cartoon network freak: I have left some comments, questions and notes in the article please read them and give me some feedback, the issues have now been addressed. MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 18:07, 12 September 2016 (UTC)[reply]

@MarioSoulTruthFan: responded to your comments and started to re-review this article over the next two weeks. Sorry, but I'm involved with school now; the new school year begins tomorrow :) Best, Cartoon network freak (talk) 19:26, 12 September 2016 (UTC)[reply]

I believe you mean to ping me, ok I will take a look at your replies and see what I can do about them. I won't edit the "re-review", don't worry. MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 20:14, 12 September 2016 (UTC)[reply]

@MarioSoulTruthFan: Sorry, I was pretty involved with him the past weeks and I have switched up you with him. Sorry

Cartoon network freak (talk) 10:06, 13 September 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Re-Review

Re-review

Lead

than his previous material → than his previous releases
on theUS → leave space
Later, Unorthodox Jukebox → italicize title
topped the charts → topped the chart
The record peaked at number one → The record further peaked at number one
of the album by the release → of the album was preceded by the release
In between the release of the lead single and the record were the premiere of promotional singles "Young Girls" on November 6, "Moonshine" on November 19 and "When I Was Your Man" on December 4, 2012. The latter was released as the album's second single, one month and half later, on January 15, 2013 and became Mars' fourth single to top the US Billboard Hot 100 and experienced similar mainstream success as the lead. "Treasure" debuted on May 10, 2013, as the record's third single and was a moderate commercial success, peaking at number 5 on the US chart. "Gorilla" and "Young Girls" were the fourth and fifth singles, respectively. → Subsequently, four other singles (enlist them) were made available for consumption and were similarly successful in the United States. (You needn't add that much detail in the lead.)

Done

Background

Conception

ending The Doo-Wops & Hooligans Tour → ending his... (there is no name before to make reference?) MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 12:38, 18 September 2016 (UTC)[reply]
He had to say → He additionally confessed that,
because of the deadline of the release → because of the release's deadline
and didn't want the same to happen twice → you may remove this; it's clear enough.
September 2012, on a preview → remove comma
the singer had to change → the singer reportedly had to change
The variety of styles presented on this album resulted in his rejection several times in the past; he confessed that had to face criticism by label presidents who expressed to him, → The variety of music styles presented on Unorthodox Jukebox resulted in his rejection several times in the past; he also confessed that he had to face criticism by label presidents who—according to him—expressed,
the singer said he felt disgusted → the singer added that he felt "disgusted"
as he wanted to do the music he felt like doing and not the music he was told to do. → this is very unencyclopedic; try to say it in another way
Nevertheless, Mars always remembers the most valuable lesson he learned by the time he started to conjugate his song-writing skills with song rhythm. "Does it make you move? Make you dance? Whether the song is uptempo or a ballad", Mars further added "there has to be a heartbeat in back of it. There needs to be a pulse in the song". That was his ultimate goal for the album. → Mars further confessed that by the time he started to develop his songwriting skills, he learned the "most valuable lesson", "Does it make you move? Make you dance? Whether the song is uptempo or a ballad", adding that "there has to be a heartbeat in back of it. There needs to be a pulse in the song".
Philip Lawrence from Mars' The Smeezingtons → remove "Mars'"
recalled the sleepless nights → recalled sleepless nights during the record's process
Unlink "debut album"
The first → He went on expressing that the first

Done

Recording

Image > You forgot to add a full stop at the end of the sentence
Speech box > Mark Ronson, on → Remove comma
because he wanted the record to be done with live instrumentation, but still be playable at the club. → as he wanted the record to incorporate live instrumentation, but to sill be suitable for clubs.
club. Bhasker admitted that it sounded great on the radio. → club; Bhasker admitted that it would sound great on the radio.

Bhasker was talking about the album and songs at that time, not making previsions, I can't change the tenses like that. MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 13:04, 20 September 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Diplo, American DJ, was able to push the album further from the "safety net" with something for the [strip] club on "Money Makes Her Smile", Mars claimed that the American DJ can make the club go "wild" due to the sounds on his computer. → American disc jockey Diplo was able to further push the album from the "safety net" with something for the [strip] club on "Money Makes Her Smile"; Mars claimed that he could make the club go "wild" due to the sounds on his computer.
one genre", during → remove comma
of the several styles of music he listens to, "by having → of several other music styles "by having
and claim I feel → and claim [he feels]
Due to this music variety → replace "this" with "the"
"pick a lane" for the album → "pick a lane" for Unorthodox Jukebox
to create this album → to create the album
he had the chance → he had the possibility
other acts for a long time, writing pop and radio-friendly songs → other pop and radio-friendly acts for a long time,
create this new sound → create a new sound
Paul Epworth, a A-list team of producers → remove "a A-list team of producers".
Mars described → The singer described
song written for the album → song written for Unorthodox Jukebox
becoming the mascot → becoming its mascot
granted to Rolling Stone → for the Rolling Stone + link Rolling Stone here and not later in this section
Blanco said → Blanco confessed,
like "Sinnerman"" → like 'Sinnerman'"
was made for the album → was conceived for the album
During an interview with Rolling Stone magazine, Mars explained → Remove "During an interview with Rolling Stone magazine,"
album like this it was mandatory → album like that it was—according to him—mandatory
known pattern, in other words, the producers enlisted to be behind this album had to be unexpected such as jazz artist Esperanza Spalding and electronic producer Diplo. Not only this was necessary, but he also had to take "pop's most innovative producers" (Bhasker, Haynie and Ronson) → very unencyclopedic; reword or make a quote out of this
While doing the → While being interviewed for the
"fearless", he explained → "fearless" and explaining that
Mars realized, regarding the existence of no boundaries, that when he tries something he hasn't done before he feels a rush in his being. → You need to make a quote out of this
By the end of September Mars was → By the end of September 2012, Mars was reportedly
and didn't want to have a repetition of the experience. → remove; it's overfluous
As of mid-October → Starting with mid-October
the album at Levcon Studios (their studio). Ari Levine sent a few tracks over e-mail with their final mix to Mars, who was still in Manhattan after hosting Saturday Night Live. According to Levine, this was due to Mars' perfectionism. → the album at their Levcon Studios, while Ari Levine sent a few tracks over e-mail with their final mix to Mars, who was still in Manhattan after hosting Saturday Night Live—according to him—due his perfectionism.

Done}

Composition

ballad, which → remove comma
though he → though the singer
recognizes what → recognizes that what
track with elements → track that incorporates elements... in its instrumentation

Elements of a song in its instrumentation? I don't get it. MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 16:53, 20 September 2016 (UTC)[reply]

the second track and lead single → the subsequent track
lyrically it is the exploration of feeling and being in love → lyrically explorating themes of love
style by The Police → style used by English band The Police
Musically, it is a midtempo rock and → The track portrays a ...
song. Lyrically, the song expresses male chauvinist sentiments and makes a reference to his 2010 arrest for cocaine possession. → song, while lyrically expressing male chauvinist sentiments and making reference ...
inspired by Wham! and heavily by Breakbot's → inspired by English duo and French disc jockey Breakbot's
Add year of release in brackets after the songs's title by Breakbot
"Baby I'm Yours".[26][27] It was produced ... → "Baby I'm Yours"; it was produced by ...
promotional single → promotional single from the record
is a song with ample influences → portrays a recording with ample influences
quiet storm, being compared to French → quiet storm, while being compared to the work done by French
as he regrets → as Mars regrets
of HitFix thought that the song → of HitFix thought the track
The single was compared to some of Wham! work. → The single was was likened to the material of Wham!
With "Natalie" Mars exhibits, once more, male chauvinist sentiments,[24] when it is revealed that a girl (Natalie) stole Mars' money and ran away with it, therefore he is plotting murderous revenge against her. → With "Natalie", Mars exhibits further male chauvinist sentiments, with it being revealed that a girl named Natalie...
Your Man" with Mars → add a comma before "with"
a 'gold-digging bitch' → add "" instead of ''
The nimble → The recording's nimble
"Show Me" is a song with ample → "Show Me" portrays a recording with ample
The ninth track → The ninth track from Unorthodox Jukebox
link "strip club" to its respective article on Wikipedia
strip club by → strip club done by
was an awful song to be played in such place → was not to be played in such place
The record is a → The recording is a
infused with disco → infused with disco elements
"If I Knew" → add a comma after the song's name
"Old & Crazy" is a duet → "Old & Crazy", a duet
Esperanza Spalding, included → Esperanza Spalding, was included
deluxe version of the album → deluxe version of Unorthodox Jukebox
one of the song producers → one of the track's producers
said that the song is reminiscent → confessed that the song is reminiscent
He explained that everything began when Emile Haynie made a beat and Bhasker added a sample of a Django Reinhardt song. → He went on explaining that the process began with Emile Haynie making a beat and Bhasker adding a sample of a a Django Reinhardt recording over it. + link "Django Reinhardt" to its page on Wikipedia.

Done

Singles

and its digital release was → and was digitally released
beat and the lyrics → beat, but also its lyrics for
Commercially, it → Commercially, the recording
and stayed in the top spot for six weeks → and claiming the position for six weeks
making it Mars' longest-running number one on the chart (previously, 'Just the Way You Are' and 'Grenade' each topped the chart for four weeks). → marking Mars' longest-running number one on the chart after previously released "Just the Way You Are" (2010) and "Grenade" (2010) each topped it for four editions. + link songs to their respective articles.
Elsewhere, it peaked → The song further peaked
and the US Pop Songs → and on the US Pop Songs
chart and inside the top ten in more than twenty countries. → chart, while inside the top ten in more than twenty countries
second official single → remove "official"
previously been released → previously been premiered
month and half → month and a half
to its single release → to its stand-alone release
It received generally positive reviews from most music critics → The track was critically acclaimed
who praised it → receiving praising
being and → being an
and "its minimal → and for featuring a "minimal
becoming Mars' 5th number → becoming the singer's fifth number
United States[47] and has peaked inside the top fifteen in more than ten countries. United States;[47] it reached the top fifteen in fellow several territories.
The song was → The track was (due to word repetition)
for the Best Pop Solo Performance awards → remove "the" and "awards"
was confirmed as the album's third official single → was subsequently confirmed as the record's third single
Mars has performed → Mars performed
performance on the 2013 → show at the 2013...
link "Billboard Music Awards" to its respective page on Wikipedia
The single reached the top 5 in the Billboard Hot 100 and charted inside the top 10 in 18 countries all over the world → Commercially, "Treasure" reached the top five in the United States and managed to peak within the top five in fellow eighteen countries.
"Gorilla" was confirmed as the fourth official single.[53] The production was handled by the same who produced the lead single, The Smeezingtons, Mark Ronson, Jeff Bhasker and Emile Haynie. → "Gorilla", confirmed as the next single for Unorthodox Jukebox, was produced by The Smeezingtons..., who previously handled the process for the record's lead single.
U.S.pop radio → American pop radio
selected countries as → selected countries including
It was officially released by Bruno Mars during an interview in Nova 96.9, an Australian radio, as the official fifth single on November 26, 2013. → Mars announced its availability during an interview with Nova 96.9, an Australian radio station, on November 26, 2013.
Some of the highest peak positions of the song are due to the release as the first promotional single on the iTunes Store on November 6, 2012. → Commercially, its charting was influenced by its stand-alone release as the record's first promotional single on November 6, 2012 through iTunes Store.

Done

Release and promotion

Image > link the name of the tour + add a full stop (.) after the sentence + at the Arena Ciudad → remove "the"

I have not added a link to the tour name, since it'ss already on the "see also".MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 16:48, 18 September 2016 (UTC)[reply]

release of Unorthodox Jukebox → italicize album name
link "Twitter" to its respective article on Wikipedia
"Whatta Man" where → add a comma before "where"
himself, in → remove comma
celebrate.. → one full stop is enough
and its release date on December 11, 2012 in the United States. → and its American release date on December 11, 2012
Mars was featured → He was as well featured
link "Digital Spy" to its respective article
by Mars. A week earlier, a promo shot used for his Billboard cover story tried to pass by as the official artwork. → by Mars after a promo shot was previously used for a Billboard issue.
At the same time, the official order of the tracklist was also revealed → You can remove this, as you already said Digital Spy revealed it
which would lead to the album's release → remove
was premiered worldwide → was made available for consumption worldwide
Later, on November 19, 2012, "Moonshine" was released as the album's second promotional single.[63] "When I Was Your Man", was released as the third and last promotional single of the series on December 3, 2012. → Subsequently, "Moonshine" and "When I Was Your Man" were released as the last promotional singles on November 19, 2012 and December 3, 2012, respectively.
first time on Saturday Night Live on October 20, 2012.[64] His performance as the host received positive reactions from critics and the public. → first time on Saturday Night Live on October 20, 2012, while receiving positive reaction from critics and the audience.
Victoria's Secret Fashion Show.[65] The → connect both sentences with a ";" (semicolon)
where he played → to perform
performed in the 2012 edition → performed at the 2012 edition
which happened in → which took place at
London. On December 12, 2012, he performed "Locked Out of Heaven" → London, whilst performing "Locked Out of Heaven" on December 12, 2012
of the American → remove "the"
Mars sang the second single → Mars further sang the record's second single
on December 17, 2012 → held on December 17, 2012
Mars embarked → The singer embarked
as of June 22, 2013, at the Verizon Center in Washington, D.C., United States. → starting with June 22, 2013 at the Verizon...
Unlink "United States", "Canada" and "Puerto Rico".
The second leg was announced at the same time on February 20, 2013, consisting of concerts all over Europe. It ran from October to November 2014. → The tour's second leg, announced on February 20, 2013, consisted of concerts all over Europe; it an from October to November 2014 + unlink "Europe"
The tour ran from June 22, 2013 to October 18, 2014, with 5 legs to promote the album. → The Moonshine Jungle Tour ended on October 18, 2014, having Mars performing on a total of five legs.

Done

Critical reception

of 100 to reviews → of 100 reviews
bulk of Unorthodox Jukebox → bulk of Unorthodox Jukebox
presenting Bruno Mars → presenting [the singer] (spelling the full name twice is not allowed on Wiki)
waters", however he felt → waters." Hyman went on feeling
earlier work ... a → earlier work [...] a
Caramanica of The New York Times felt → ... labelled
always pulls it" → always pulls it."
the incorporation of rock and soul styles on the record. → remove "on the record"
writing in Paste → add comma after "Paste"
The critic argues → The critic went on arguing
that his songwriting values → that Mars' songwriting
Finally, Chan → Closing the review, Chan
his idea with Mars' satisfactory singing is both a → the singer
idea with → idea saying that
felt that Mars is a "talented chap" → felt that the singer is a "talented chap"
back from Doo-Wops → Although it is a quote, make sure you write the full name of the album and italicize it then.
singer as an → singer for being an
Shepard remix was nominated for → Shepard remix received a nomination for
received a nomination for Best Pop Solo Performance. → won a nomination... (word repetition)
music service, the record was the fifth most-streamed worldwide → music service, Unorthodox Jukebox was the fifth most-streamed record worldwide.

Done

Commercial performance

copies, but dropped → copies, dropping
twelve weeks since the release, the album → twelve weeks since the availability, the record
reached the top → reached the top spot
rebounding back within → rebounding Unorthodox Jukebox back in
February 12, 2014,Unorthodox Jukebox → February 12, 2014, the album
Connect the two sentences before the certification is mentioned
platinum → Platinum
The album's success → The record's
throughout 2013 → in 2013
contributed → was decisive
at the half time → on the half-time
which according to Bill Werde, editorial director of Billboard magazine, the fact that "His songs stuck around on multiple formats all year round", played a key role[10][97] and the most played artist at Pop Radio (Top 40), the third most played at Rhythmic stations and Hot Adult Contemporary station (HAC), as well as the fifth most played at AC stations in 2013, according to Mediabase. → split in two sentences; also reword a bit
italicize Billboard
Year-End → year-end
the album was a success → the album was similarly successful
artist album of 2012 → recorded by an artist in 2012
The number of copies sold was above 100,000 copies, therefore it was certified Gold by the British Phonographic Industry (BPI). As of April 2014, the record has been certified three times Platinum in the United Kingdom. → It first brought total sales to over 100,000 copies in the United Kingdom, thus earning a Gold certification, but was later certified three times Platinum by the British Phonographic Industry (BPI).
Top 10 → top ten
year in the Top 20 → year within the top twenty
copies, the album was certified → copies, therefore being
Write "SNEP" out and then add "SNEP" in "()"
It was Mars' first Diamond certified album. → you can leave this out; too much detail
The album has sold over 580,000 copies in France. → As of 2014, the record sold 580,000 units in that territory.
In Switzerland, the album debuted at number one on the charts → In Switzerland, the album debuted atop the charts
while it entered → while opening
and five months after its release it was certified Gold in Denmark. → and gaining a Gold disc there after five months.
The album reached the top 10 → The album further charted within the top ten
In the paragraph's last sentence, you repeat "album" two times.
What is The Black Keys? Add nationality and band.
Italicize their album and make sure you add its release year in brackets.
by Recorded Music NZ → by the Recorded...
in its second week sales → in two weeks
Eventually, the album peaked at number two thus becoming Mars' second consecutive number two album in the country → The album eventually reached its peak position at number two in that country, marking the singer's consecutive record to do so.
On February 2014, the album was certified three times Platinum. → As of February 2014, Unorthodox Jukebox was certified three times Platinum in New Zealand.
The album landed at number 8 on its first week and three weeks after its debut, it reached the top position.[110] The album has sold a total of 210,000 copies in Australia by December 2013, being certified three times Platinum. → The record entered the Australian charts at number three, gradually climbing to the top spot, with it bringing total sales to 210,000 units and being similarly certified.
entered the Canadian Albums Chart at number two.[113] On the week of July 20, 2013, the album reached the top spot of the chart. → opened the Canadian Albums Chart at number two, later reaching number one on the week ending July 20, 2013.
After the performance at the Super Bowl XLVIII halftime show, the album peaked at number one for the second time. → This info might be removed
with sales of 18,414 in its first week → with first-week sales counting 18,414 copies
of 186,825 → of 186,825 units
The album reached the top of Mexican Albums Chart and ended 2013 as the seventh best selling album in Mexico, spending fifty-five weeks in the charts.[118] The album was certified two times Platinum and one Gold, on June 2014, selling over 150,000 copies.[119] In 2014, Unorthodox Jukebox sold 3.2 million copies worldwide.[120] By January 2015, the album had sold over 6 million copies since its release. → The album topped the Mexican Albums Chart and remains the seventh best-selling release there, with it spending 55 weeks in the chart and earning a two times Platinum+Gold certification for exceeding sales of over 150,000 copies. As of 2014, Unorthodox Jukebox sold 3.2 million units globally, while bringing totals sales to 6 million copies by January 2015.

Done

Release history

worldwide, via Mars' → remove comma
to purchase; they all included → to purchase—including
Digital Album → digital release
record's physical release → record's physical issue
for the first three singles → for the first singles of Unorthodox Jukebox

Done

Outcome[edit]

@MarioSoulTruthFan: This is my re-review of your GAN. I've put this On hold for 7 days to allow edits. Once you're ready, please ping me back so I can do the few resting fine-tuning things by myself before passing. Best, Cartoon network freak (talk) 23:26, 16 September 2016 (UTC)[reply]

@Cartoon network freak: done. MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 18:03, 23 September 2016 (UTC)[reply]

@MarioSoulTruthFan: These were my final edits on the article in order to pass it to GA status. Congrats! Cartoon network freak (talk) 22:01, 23 September 2016 (UTC)[reply]

The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.