Talk:Twin Suns/GA1

Page contents not supported in other languages.
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

GA Review[edit]

Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer: Some Dude From North Carolina (talk · contribs) 20:11, 22 May 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Hey, I'm going to be reviewing this article. Expect comments by the end of the week. Some Dude From North Carolina (talk) 20:11, 22 May 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Infobox and lead[edit]

  • Add the "use mdy dates" template to fix citations per WP:BADDATE.
  • The lead should be expanded to two to three paragraphs to summarize the entire article.
 Done, I hope it is enough to summarize the article, I did not want to spoil the episode's main twist (which makes up most of the Writing section). Yeeno (talk) 🍁 22:15, 27 May 2021 (UTC)[reply]
Looks great. Some Dude From North Carolina (talk) 22:24, 27 May 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Plot[edit]

  • Isn't the word "Holocron", also seen in #Casting, supposed to be capitalized?
Looking at Wookieepedia, it is not capitalized as an in-universe object. Yeeno (talk) 🍁 17:45, 27 May 2021 (UTC)[reply]
Just asking since Wikipedia and various sources have it capitalized. Some Dude From North Carolina (talk) 18:58, 27 May 2021 (UTC)[reply]
I understand the confusion, Wikipedia refers to the real-life database (capitalized), while the fictional in-universe object is not. Yeeno (talk) 🍁 19:05, 27 May 2021 (UTC)[reply]
  • "Shortly afterwards" → "Shortly afterward" (American English)
  • The plot section is under 400 words, so that passes MOS:TVPLOT.

Production[edit]

  • Recite sources at the end of every quote per WP:QUOTE.
Is this needed for the mid sentence quote? If not I only recited the one that preceded a semi-colon. Yeeno (talk) 🍁 18:08, 27 May 2021 (UTC)[reply]
No, just for sentences containing quotes. The one with "wretched hive of scum and villainy" needs a recite. Some Dude From North Carolina (talk) 18:45, 27 May 2021 (UTC)[reply]
I'm not sure how to treat this one, since the full line is not referenced in the article, but rather mentioned as the "'scum and villainy' line" (see ref 15); I only included the full line to make it clear to the readers what it refers to. Yeeno (talk) 🍁 19:09, 27 May 2021 (UTC)[reply]
Well, the phrase would need a citation at the end of the sentence its in. Some Dude From North Carolina (talk) 19:12, 27 May 2021 (UTC)[reply]
 Done Yeeno (talk) 🍁 19:18, 27 May 2021 (UTC)[reply]
  • "creation the episode" → "creation of the episode"
  • "Lucasfilm Story Group, who" → "Lucasfilm Story Group, which" (not a person)
  • "the season 2" doesn't sound right - maybe change it to "the second season"
  • "one off" → "one-off"
  • Is the comma after "emotional connection" necessary?
  • Remove the comma after "controversial" (short sentence).
  • "the The Phantom Menace" → "The Phantom Menace"
  • "as at the same age is" is confusing so reword
Dropped the "as" here, sounds better. Yeeno (talk) 🍁 17:52, 27 May 2021 (UTC)[reply]
  • "According the Filoni" → "According to Filoni"
  • Remove the comma after "protecting".
  • "21 minute" → "21-minute"
  • Remove the comma after "impressed".
  • Remove the comma after "contributions to the character".

Promotion and release[edit]

  • "in United Kingdom" → "in the United Kingdom"

Reception[edit]

  • Slash Film → /Film
  • New York Daily News → New York Daily News
  • "well received" → "well-received" (both uses)
  • Add a serial comma after "Kenobi, Maul".
  • Order the citations after "storyline".
  • Also make a WP:CITEBUNDLE to avoid WP:OVERCITE.
  • IGN → IGN
  • "the The AV Club" → The A.V. Club
  • This section has a lot of quotes so try paraphrasing and expanding the section per WP:RECEPTION.
 Done Yeeno (talk) 🍁 22:36, 29 May 2021 (UTC)[reply]

References[edit]

  • #3 is missing its author and date parameters.
  • Use "cite AV media" for #5.
This is already done. Yeeno (talk) 🍁 18:47, 27 May 2021 (UTC)[reply]
  • #6, #11, #13, #16, #18, #21, #22, #24, #25 are missing authors.
  • Try wikilinking websites.
  • #19 and #23 should be "Anderton; Joe" instead of "Joe Anderton"
  • Remove "- Nerdist" from the title of #21 and change the website name to "Nerdist".
  • "CINEMABLEND" → "CinemaBlend"
  • Properly cite #24 and wikilink Mitch Metcalf.
  • "KEANE, SEAN" → "Keane, Sean"
  • "nydailynews.com" → New York Daily News
  • The AV ClubThe A.V. Club
  • ScreenRantScreen Rant
  • Sources are archived.


Some Dude From North Carolina: I've implemented all your suggestions. If the reception section still needs work, any advice or assistance would be greatly appreciated. Thanks for reviewing this! Yeeno (talk) 🍁 23:10, 29 May 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Progress[edit]

GA review
(see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not)
  1. It is reasonably well written.
    a (prose, spelling, and grammar):
    b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):
  2. It is factually accurate and verifiable.
    a (references):
    b (citations to reliable sources):
    c (OR):
    d (copyvio and plagiarism):
  3. It is broad in its coverage.
    a (major aspects):
    b (focused):
  4. It follows the neutral point of view policy.
    Fair representation without bias:
  5. It is stable.
    No edit wars, etc.:
  6. It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.
    a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales):
    b (appropriate use with suitable captions):

Overall:
Pass/Fail:

· · ·