Talk:To Ramona/GA1

GA Review

Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer: K. Peake (talk · contribs) 08:53, 21 November 2022 (UTC)

Good Article review progress box Criteria: 1a. prose () 1b. MoS () 2a. ref layout () 2b. cites WP:RS () 2c. no WP:OR () 2d. no WP:CV () 3a. broadness () 3b. focus () 4. neutral () 5. stable () 6a. free or tagged images () 6b. pics relevant () Note: this represents where the article stands relative to the Good Article criteria. Criteria marked are unassessed

I will crack on with this now! --K. Peake 08:53, 21 November 2022 (UTC)

Infobox and lead

• Change Columbia Recording Studios to Columbia Recording under the studios parameter in the infobox
• Pipe Tom Wilson to Tom Wilson (record producer)
• "which was released on his fourth studio album" → "first released on his fourth studio album,"
• Add a sentence with notable info about writing from the first section
• Move the recording sentence to being the one before lyrical content
• Mention next to the critics suggested part that the narrator advises Ramona not to follow others' advice
• Pipe Sara Lownds to Sara Dylan
• "for Another Side of Bob Dylan," → "for the album,"
• Remove the album release in August since that is not notable
• "have ranked the song as" → "have ranked it as"
• Pipe B-side to A-side and B-side
• "Belgium and Luxembourg in 1967, and has been" → "Belgium, and Luxembourg in 1967, and has since been"
• Mention what the several live versions include

• All done. I mentioned two of the several live versions in the lead. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 19:29, 21 November 2022 (UTC)

Background and recording

• "The "To Ramona" lyrics were" → "The lyrics of "To Ramona" were"
• Wikilink as the May Fair Hotel instead
• Add a comma after "All I Really Want to Do"
• "On June 9 at" → "On June 9, 1964, at" per this being a new para
• Remove the comma before Another Side of Bob Dylan
• Pipe Tom Wilson to Tom Wilson (record producer), while mentioning that he was the producer of all the tracks
• "as the sixth track, the last" → "as the sixth track and the last"
• Remove the release year of "The Last Letter" from brackets when it is already mentioned in prose

• All Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 18:45, 21 November 2022 (UTC)

Lyrical interpretation

• Maybe add relevant text to the img of Suze Rotolo?
• "The song ends with" → "It ends with"
• [8] should solely be invoked at the end of the sentence
• "argue that the song may indeed refer to Baez," → "argue that Dylan may indeed refer to her,"
• "Oliver Trager and" → "Oliver Trager, and"
• Pipe Sara Lownds to Sara Dylan
• "John Nogowski saw it" → "John Nogowski sees it"
• "Jim Beviglia wrote that the track" → "Jim Beviglia writes that the track"
• "as the narrator expresses" → "as they express"

• Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 19:12, 21 November 2022 (UTC)

Critical reception

• Retitle to Reception per the rankings
• "Heylin described the track as" → "Heylin describes the track as"
• "words or advice."" → "words or advice"." per MOS:QWQ
• "Trager praised the" → "Trager praises the"

• Amended per the four points above. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 18:59, 21 November 2022 (UTC)

• "but added that "Dylan fumbles" → "but added how "Dylan fumbles"

• Reworked per WP:QUOTEFARM comment below. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 18:59, 21 November 2022 (UTC)

• "and described it as" → "and describes it as"
• "has ever written."" → "has ever written"."
• Wikilink Rolling Stone
• "remarked of "To Ramona" and" → "remarks of "To Ramona" and"

• Amended per the four points above. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 18:59, 21 November 2022 (UTC)

• Cut down the amount of direct quoting for the above per WP:QUOTEFARM

• I made some amendments. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 18:59, 21 November 2022 (UTC)

Live performances and later releases

• Make the releases para the last of this section instead
• Pipe B-side to A-side and B-side
• "Belgium and Luxembourg" → "Belgium, and Luxembourg"
• Wikilink compilation album
• "Dylan's older songs "re-envisioned almost to the point of non-recognition."" → "his older songs "re-envisioned almost to the point of non-recognition"." per MOS:QWQ

• Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 17:09, 21 November 2022 (UTC)

Credits and personnel

• Pipe Tom Wilson to Tom Wilson (record producer)

• Done. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 17:02, 21 November 2022 (UTC)

Notes

• The ref is not needed for this note when it is invoked at the end of the actual sentence

• Removed. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 19:30, 21 November 2022 (UTC)

References

• Copyvio score looks decent at 37.5%
• Wikilink Scarecrow Press per MOS:LINK2SECT
• Pipe Carlton to Welbeck Publishing Group
• Wikilink Princeton University Press and author-link Timothy Hampton
• Wikilink Penguin Books
• Wikilink Constable & Robinson
• Pipe Faber And Faber to Faber and Faber
• Bodley Head → The Bodley Head with the wikilink
• Pipe Black Dog & Leventhal to Black Dog & Leventhal Publishers
• Wikilink Billboard Books and shouldn't this be italicised?

• I tried, but got an error message "Italic or bold markup not allowed in: publisher=" BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 17:24, 21 November 2022 (UTC)

• Maybe cite ref 13 solely in place of refs 11 and 17?

• I've retained these as there are a couple of direct quotations cited. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 17:24, 21 November 2022 (UTC)

• Pipe Uncut to Uncut (magazine) on ref 19
• Wikilink Rolling Stone on ref 21 and why is 2015 in the date?

• There is a note on the article, which has a publiction date of May 24, 2020, that "This list originally appeared in a 2015 Special Edition" BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 17:24, 21 November 2022 (UTC)

• Wikilink The Guardian on ref 22
• Newport Daily News → The Newport Daily News on ref 25 with the wikilink
• Wikilink USA Today on ref 27
• Cite Variety for ref 28, piping to Variety (magazine)
• Wikilink The New York Observer on ref 31

• Done, except where noted above. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 17:24, 21 November 2022 (UTC)

External links

• Good

Final comments and verdict

•  On hold until all of the issues are fixed; nice job on this one! --K. Peake 11:14, 21 November 2022 (UTC)

• Many thank, K. Peake. Let me know if anything else is required. Regards, BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 19:31, 21 November 2022 (UTC)

• ✓ Pass now, did some brief copy editing but nice job here! --K. Peake 09:17, 22 November 2022 (UTC)